The
Acadumby Awards, better known as the Oscars, is one of the stupidest,
phoniest, cheesiest, and most ridiculous annual events (of any kind) in
the world - that much we know. However, what very few of you do know is
that every year Hollywood honours actresses with the obscure but to me
most prestigious award of them all - the Best Tits Oscar.
I am quite pleased (and a little proud too I have to admit) to inform you that I have been the Chairman of this award ceremony since its inception in 1968. That year, Hollywood realized that decadence had finally hit the big screens to the extent where there were enough boobs to validate the existence of such an award. Until then, bare tits were rarely seen in films, due to heavy censorship laws, the fact that there were less sluts in show-biz, and because the Kremlin-pushed hippie revolution hadn't yet happened i.e. brought about a general lowering of standards.
Very importantly, the breastal winners aren't decided by the usual 5,000 morons who infest Tinseltown and vote for those idiotic regular Oscars. As a result, factors such as political orientation, nepotism, and pat-on-the-back favouritism do not influence the outcome in any way. As Chairman of these awards, I personally handpick the 5,000 voters, and I can assure you that they are all male and straight. There's none of that nonsense of gays and women deciding what does or doesn't constitute a beautiful female body, as is the case with Hollywood and the fashion world these days (which is why we have increasingly ugly women celebs such as Jennifer Aniston - who has very shit tits, as well, I might add).
How did I pick the 5,000 voters? I'd decided that the best men for the job are chronic masturbators.
RULES: Documentaries, movie shorts, music clips, and porn are not eligible. Silicone implants are banned from competing, so you won't be seeing any of those; breast implants are a form of cheating, but more importantly they're extremely ugly. All nominees get their breasts hand-tested, in cases where it's not 100% sure whether their tits are real or not. Asking them whether their boobs are fake isn't enough since, as we all know, actresses tend to lie a lot - and not just on casting couches.
LAYOUT: Each year shows ALL the outstanding tits. Actresses with average or shitty tits are not included, no matter how famous they may be. FIVE of these are selected to be actual nominees, just like with the regular shitty Oscars. The winner and the other four nominees are all marked with bold orange lettering. For those of you who still don't get it: these 5 are the best of the year. All the candidates - nominees and non-nominees - aren't listed in any particular order, except the winner who is shown at the end of each year's list.
So now that you know who picked the winners and what the criteria are, check out the lucky gals who got to carry home these prestigious awards for showing their great tits to the general public.
A more primitive version of the Best Tits Oscar list had first been posted by me in 2009.
2006.
And The Best Tits Oscar Goes To...
2007.
And The Best Tits Oscar Goes To...
I am quite pleased (and a little proud too I have to admit) to inform you that I have been the Chairman of this award ceremony since its inception in 1968. That year, Hollywood realized that decadence had finally hit the big screens to the extent where there were enough boobs to validate the existence of such an award. Until then, bare tits were rarely seen in films, due to heavy censorship laws, the fact that there were less sluts in show-biz, and because the Kremlin-pushed hippie revolution hadn't yet happened i.e. brought about a general lowering of standards.
Very importantly, the breastal winners aren't decided by the usual 5,000 morons who infest Tinseltown and vote for those idiotic regular Oscars. As a result, factors such as political orientation, nepotism, and pat-on-the-back favouritism do not influence the outcome in any way. As Chairman of these awards, I personally handpick the 5,000 voters, and I can assure you that they are all male and straight. There's none of that nonsense of gays and women deciding what does or doesn't constitute a beautiful female body, as is the case with Hollywood and the fashion world these days (which is why we have increasingly ugly women celebs such as Jennifer Aniston - who has very shit tits, as well, I might add).
How did I pick the 5,000 voters? I'd decided that the best men for the job are chronic masturbators.
RULES: Documentaries, movie shorts, music clips, and porn are not eligible. Silicone implants are banned from competing, so you won't be seeing any of those; breast implants are a form of cheating, but more importantly they're extremely ugly. All nominees get their breasts hand-tested, in cases where it's not 100% sure whether their tits are real or not. Asking them whether their boobs are fake isn't enough since, as we all know, actresses tend to lie a lot - and not just on casting couches.
LAYOUT: Each year shows ALL the outstanding tits. Actresses with average or shitty tits are not included, no matter how famous they may be. FIVE of these are selected to be actual nominees, just like with the regular shitty Oscars. The winner and the other four nominees are all marked with bold orange lettering. For those of you who still don't get it: these 5 are the best of the year. All the candidates - nominees and non-nominees - aren't listed in any particular order, except the winner who is shown at the end of each year's list.
So now that you know who picked the winners and what the criteria are, check out the lucky gals who got to carry home these prestigious awards for showing their great tits to the general public.
A more primitive version of the Best Tits Oscar list had first been posted by me in 2009.
Oscars For Best Tits:
2006-2007
2006.
 |
| Hayley Marie Coppin in "Cashback" |
 |
| Keeley Hazell in "Cashback" |
 |
| Janine-May Tinsley & Irene Bagach in "Cashback" |
 |
| Sarah B. Lund in "Deadwood" |
 |
| Jaclyn A. Smith in "American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile" |
 |
| Ariella Hirshfeld in "Klimt" |
 |
| Julie Brauning in "Klimt" |
 |
| Angel Lewis & Candace Kroslak in "American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile" |
 |
| Jana Kaderabkova in "Hostel" |
 |
| Gabi Fleming in "Das Leben der Anderen" |
 |
| Laetitia Casta in "Le grand appartement" |
 |
| Elena Tecuta in "Van Wilder" |
 |
| Jessica Lous in "Bloody Mary" & Leonor Watling in "The Baby's Room" |
 |
| Isild le Besco in "The Untouchable" |
 |
| Shiva Gholamianzadeh in "Minotaur" & Petra Hrebickova in "I Served the King of England" |
 |
| Marie Allan in "Les anges exterminateurs" |
 |
| Julia Jentsch in "I Served the King of England" & Melanie Lynskey in "Park" |
 |
| Barbara Nedeljakova in "Hostel" & Zara Taylor in "Hollow Man II" |
 |
| Esther Nubiola in "Tirante el Blanco" |
 |
| Laura Bottrell in "Huff" |
 |
| Ursula Strauss in "Falling" |
 |
| Kate Graham in "Poultrygeist" |
 |
| Tara Summers in "Factory Girl" |
 |
| Carice van Houten in "Zwartboek" |
 |
| Hermila Guedes in "Love for Sale" |
 |
| Sarah Stern in "Les amants du Flore" |
And The Best Tits Oscar Goes To...
 |
| Danielle Riley for "Shadow: Dead Riot" |
2007.
 |
| Marisa Tomei in "Before the Devil Knows You're Dead" |
 |
| Sofia Gala Castiglione in "El resultado del amor" |
 |
| Oksana Borbat in "Return to House on Haunted Hill" |
 |
| Katherine Waterston in "The Babysitters" |
 |
| Karme Malaga in "Les pellicules del meu pare" |
 |
| Jessica Kiper in "Sex & Death" & Chelan Simmons in "Good Luck Chuck" |
 |
| Brigitte Hobmeier in "Weisse Lilien" & Veronica Sanchez in "Las 13 rosas" |
 |
| Meredith Giangrande in "Pool Party" & Heather Darling in "Kottentail" |
 |
| Barbara Goenaga in "Los cronocrimenes" |
 |
| Vesna Stanojevska in "Senki" |
 |
| Mischa Barton in "Closing the Ring" |
 |
| Cristina Tiberia in "Brain Dead" |
 |
| Fiona Ryan in "Tudors" |
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| Isild Le Besco in "A Parting Shot" |
 |
| Rosanne Mulholland in "Falsa loura" |
 |
| Rachelle Williams in "A Feast of Flesh" |
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| Andrea Lain in "Viva" |
 |
| Anna Biller in "Viva" |
 |
| Patricia Schumann in "The Early Years: Erik Nietzsche Part 1" |
 |
| Irina Voronina in "Towelhead" + "Reno 911" (last two pics) |
 |
| Madeline Zima in "Californication" & Filareta Atanasova in "Senki" |
 |
| Brooke Banner in "Californication" (left) + "Co-Ed Confidential" (right) |
 |
| Bai Ling in "The Gene Generation" + "Shanghai Baby" |
 |
| Danielle de Luca in "Naked Fear" |
 |
| Soraia Chaves in "Call Girl" |
And The Best Tits Oscar Goes To...
 |
| Julia Anderson (Benson) for "Masters of Horror: Right to Die" |
Best Tits Oscars 2008-2009:
http://vjetropevsoscars.blogspot.rs/2016/03/oscars-for-best-tits-2008-2009.html
A List Of All Serbian Curses:
https://vjetropev-serbiancurses.blogspot.com/2019/12/serbian-curses.html
http://vjetropevsoscars.blogspot.rs/2016/03/oscars-for-best-tits-2008-2009.html
How Low Is Your I.Q.? Do The Test!
A List Of All Serbian Curses:
https://vjetropev-serbiancurses.blogspot.com/2019/12/serbian-curses.html
21 Reasons Not To Get Tattoos! A list for all the young, impressionable, hype-happy fad slaves out there:
Hipsterism Explained:
¡¡Eres mi héroe!!, mas por favor
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